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“Please be kind to me.
Please be kind, because I am no longer myself.
Please be kind, because I am trying to manage all of this.
Don’t ask me to behave like the person we both knew. The old me is dead and I am being reborn as a mother.
The old me is no longer here. And the new one, I don’t yet know who she is.
Like a warrior after a battle, I am here, a thousand wounds and no armor.
One day, I don’t know when, these wounds will be scars, the pain will be memory,
and I will be stronger than I have ever been.
But until then, until the healing is complete, I will be weaker than ever.
More than you have ever seen me be. More than I have ever seen myself be.
Now, please just give me a little space and time to be weak. And be kind to me. Thank you.”
These are a few lines written by the new mother I was to the rest of the world. Written to ask the partner, relatives, friends, and colleagues this: do not expect the new mothers around you to be the same people as before. Do not expect them to be well either. They are struggling a lot. They are fighting to process everything that is happening in their world. To give everything they have in a moment of great physical, mental, and emotional fragility. They are probably experiencing moments of deep joy. But also moments of fear or even pain.
